Aug 2009
Mercy Mild - 2
31/08/09
I’m back at the Ellice Cafe, eh! On this last real (and real hot, I’m hopin’) week of summer, I’d like to go back to two earlier summers:
First, the summer of 1978 in the imaginary (to us) world of Jack Lovell, the character from my novel ‘Except My Love For You’. Jack graduated from Glenlawn Collegiate in 1968, as we all gathered when we read the book’s chapter ‘Crossroads’. That chapter concerned the characters’ Graduation Dance. Jack and the other characters’ childhood is the topic of Jack’s song ‘Across the Norwood Bridge’. After high school, Jack drifted to a BA (History) from the University of Winnipeg. Both of his best buddies, Gordon and Jerry, took Commerce at the University of Manitoba. Although the boys spent a lot of their free time together, Jack’s days at the downtown campus were lonely times for him. He never really clicked with any college clique - didn’t want to and didn’t try. On top of that, Jack’s romantic life during these (and later) times was topsy/turvy, and start/stop. As a teenager and young adult, his heart had followed confused signals. He pursued the girl he thought he loved - to no avail. The girl he really loved? Well, that’s in the book.
Anyway, after college Jack eventually fell into an entry level job at the Winnipeg offices of a multi-national agri-business. For no particular reason, he found himself with a career in Human Resources. Jack found this fact, like so many others in his life, to be ironic. Behind the charming smile on his softly handsome face, rested a secretly reserved personality - one that tended to introspection when healthy, but one that drifted, too often for anyone’s good, into near morbid self-absorption. Not positive self-absorption, like rock stars and other narcissists, but dark, self-deprecatory brooding. Oh, and drinking. Bit by bit and year by year, booze became the driver of Jack’s taxi. He met and married Lenore during a bout of absent-mindedness. In due course, they produced children - two boys that even Jack could see, appreciate, and cherish. But in the way of this unkind world, that did not free Jack from his shackles.
So, one summer’s evening in 1985, Jack was killing time by strumming his guitar and mumbling words that came from somewhere unknown inside, and which both comforted and scared Jack. Comforted, because the truth, however dark, always is more bearable when faced, and not hidden from. And scared because the words were not about a difficult past, or a hard present, but about an imagined future. Jack imagined himself carrying on his present life, as is, from now until the end. Dwelling on the future is not good. But that’s what he found himself doing, singing words that came from the mouth of an old man who was at the end of his rope, out of resources to even carry on, never mind get better. And the old man was pleading to someone, anyone, for mercy.
But time runs out here at the Ellice Caff, so I’ll sign off now, but leave you with the words that Jack eventually wrote down:
MERCY MILD
Intro:
In so many ways
I’ve wasted my days.
You could say I deserve what I get.
Still, I’m faced with past dealings,
With terrible feelings:
Of guilt,
And of loss,
And regret.
I’ve managed to burn through
The saints, and the saviours I knew.
So, Father Time, Mother Love,
I turn, once more, humbly,
To you.
Verse:
Mercy Mild
Why don’t you come to me?
Tap on my shoulder?
Mercy Mild
I am an old man.
Make me a child.
Chorus:
I’ve been living in the shadows.
I wanna stand in the light.
I’ve been wandering in the wilderness.
I wanna come inside
First, the summer of 1978 in the imaginary (to us) world of Jack Lovell, the character from my novel ‘Except My Love For You’. Jack graduated from Glenlawn Collegiate in 1968, as we all gathered when we read the book’s chapter ‘Crossroads’. That chapter concerned the characters’ Graduation Dance. Jack and the other characters’ childhood is the topic of Jack’s song ‘Across the Norwood Bridge’. After high school, Jack drifted to a BA (History) from the University of Winnipeg. Both of his best buddies, Gordon and Jerry, took Commerce at the University of Manitoba. Although the boys spent a lot of their free time together, Jack’s days at the downtown campus were lonely times for him. He never really clicked with any college clique - didn’t want to and didn’t try. On top of that, Jack’s romantic life during these (and later) times was topsy/turvy, and start/stop. As a teenager and young adult, his heart had followed confused signals. He pursued the girl he thought he loved - to no avail. The girl he really loved? Well, that’s in the book.
Anyway, after college Jack eventually fell into an entry level job at the Winnipeg offices of a multi-national agri-business. For no particular reason, he found himself with a career in Human Resources. Jack found this fact, like so many others in his life, to be ironic. Behind the charming smile on his softly handsome face, rested a secretly reserved personality - one that tended to introspection when healthy, but one that drifted, too often for anyone’s good, into near morbid self-absorption. Not positive self-absorption, like rock stars and other narcissists, but dark, self-deprecatory brooding. Oh, and drinking. Bit by bit and year by year, booze became the driver of Jack’s taxi. He met and married Lenore during a bout of absent-mindedness. In due course, they produced children - two boys that even Jack could see, appreciate, and cherish. But in the way of this unkind world, that did not free Jack from his shackles.
So, one summer’s evening in 1985, Jack was killing time by strumming his guitar and mumbling words that came from somewhere unknown inside, and which both comforted and scared Jack. Comforted, because the truth, however dark, always is more bearable when faced, and not hidden from. And scared because the words were not about a difficult past, or a hard present, but about an imagined future. Jack imagined himself carrying on his present life, as is, from now until the end. Dwelling on the future is not good. But that’s what he found himself doing, singing words that came from the mouth of an old man who was at the end of his rope, out of resources to even carry on, never mind get better. And the old man was pleading to someone, anyone, for mercy.
But time runs out here at the Ellice Caff, so I’ll sign off now, but leave you with the words that Jack eventually wrote down:
MERCY MILD
Intro:
In so many ways
I’ve wasted my days.
You could say I deserve what I get.
Still, I’m faced with past dealings,
With terrible feelings:
Of guilt,
And of loss,
And regret.
I’ve managed to burn through
The saints, and the saviours I knew.
So, Father Time, Mother Love,
I turn, once more, humbly,
To you.
Verse:
Mercy Mild
Why don’t you come to me?
Tap on my shoulder?
Mercy Mild
I am an old man.
Make me a child.
Chorus:
I’ve been living in the shadows.
I wanna stand in the light.
I’ve been wandering in the wilderness.
I wanna come inside
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Eternally
28/08/09
Some friends who attended my daughter Kate’s wedding in July told me they had misplaced the program for a Wedding to Remember. I referred them to Kate for a replacement program to keep as a souvenir. They also told me they thought that it would be worthwhile for non-attenders to see the poem included in the program. Kate had asked me to write something for some friends of hers to recite at the church ceremony in lieu of the second reading. Three of these friends had, a few years back, written and performed a theatre piece based upon a poem trilogy I had written some time earlier - under Kate’s direction. They liked what I had come up with, and went on to perform it gracefully and movingly at the ceremony. Consistent with the rest of my ‘for fun’ collaborations, the readers have been dubbed the Meadowlark Ensemble. They are; Amber Mills, Jennifer McNaughton, Jessica Liadsky, and Courtney Evans. Love ya’ girls! I’ll get back to the songs and the book soon, but in the meantime, by request (but consistent with my vanity!) I present the following:
ETERNALLY
We will be walking forever
So we cannot tire
From the few short steps
Of the miracle mile
That led to now
From the moment that we met.
I can’t remember
The years yet to come
Until I sit by the bank
Of the river of dreams,
The Jordan between
The worn-down embrace
Of a family’s blessing,
And the Promised Land
Of nothing more nor less
Than long-looking back
On the golden dream years
Of me and you,
As might be,
We will be.
Won’t we?
We will be walking together
Whichever whatever
From the door of the church
Of the secret heart
That fed until now
On the notion of no regret.
I can’t forget
The work yet to do
Before we lie on the bed
Of the rest in our lives,
The journey across
The wind-up clock
Of a feast and a famine,
And the cherished chime
Of the sweet carillon,
Time’s dusty toxin
Still slow-time talking
Of you and me,
As must be,
As will be,
Eternally.
ETERNALLY
We will be walking forever
So we cannot tire
From the few short steps
Of the miracle mile
That led to now
From the moment that we met.
I can’t remember
The years yet to come
Until I sit by the bank
Of the river of dreams,
The Jordan between
The worn-down embrace
Of a family’s blessing,
And the Promised Land
Of nothing more nor less
Than long-looking back
On the golden dream years
Of me and you,
As might be,
We will be.
Won’t we?
We will be walking together
Whichever whatever
From the door of the church
Of the secret heart
That fed until now
On the notion of no regret.
I can’t forget
The work yet to do
Before we lie on the bed
Of the rest in our lives,
The journey across
The wind-up clock
Of a feast and a famine,
And the cherished chime
Of the sweet carillon,
Time’s dusty toxin
Still slow-time talking
Of you and me,
As must be,
As will be,
Eternally.
The Songs - Mercy Mild
25/08/09
My friend and collaborator, Tony Buchner, leaves on Saturday for an extended stay (at least until next February?) in Puerto Vallerta Mexico, where he will be teaching English to local children. In a last minute rush to perfect his contributions to the recording project, he was over last night. Paul played us his rough mix of the bed tracks (i.e. without vocals) for the last two novel related songs, Mercy Mild and The Boat Song. One of the specific issues reviewed was Paul’s unorthodox idea of adding wah-wah effects to one of Tony’s lead guitar tracks.
For those interested, the arrangement, before the idea, was: 1) lead vocal by me, 2) back-up vocals by Paul, 2) acoustic rhythm guitar by me, 3) arpeggio-ish electric guitar track by Tony, 4) single note-ish lead electric guitar track by Tony, 5) bass by Paul, and 6) drums by Luke Bergen. At that point, Paul had used about 12+ tracks - not much in this day and age. The song has a very simple structure (G, Bm, C, D verse, C, G, C, D chorus), and very simple words. We felt that we had used enough different instruments. When we tried more instrumental ‘voices’, it seemed to clutter the recording. But something ‘fatter’ still seemed to be required. Tony’s single note lead guitar part is very important in this recording, and Paul had captured (and buffed up here and there) a solid performance by Tony. The solo had been played on Tony’s Stratocaster, through his Vox amplifier. The result was ‘right’, but not enough.
Paul tried routing the track through his (Paul’s) Mesa Boogie amplifier, with the controls/effects set in a bunch of different combinations. He also tried a routing through my Garnet amplifier (with and without its on-board reverb and tremolo) plus Paul’s multiple effects box - but that didn’t give enough boost to the original signal do the job. Eventually, Paul found a Mesa/effects box setting that worked best. However, when added to the other tracks and roughly edited, the result was pleasant, and appropriate for the song, but only ‘good enough’ - which isn’t good enough for Paul. So he ran the new Mesa boosted track through the Mesa again, at the same settings, and manually added wah-wah effects using my Cry Baby pedal. As a starting point he wah-wahed Tony’s part through the whole song.
On paper, the result should have been awful; cheesy and corny at best, and a God-awful mess at worst. It wasn’t. Paul played it for me, and I liked it. With a certain amount of trepidation, we played it for Tony, embedded in a rough mix of the bed tracks (including both the wah-wahed, and the un-wahed versions of the new Mesa lead guitar track) - while I sang the lead vocal live in the studio. With some hesitation, Tony said he thought it might work. All three of us agreed that Paul should try various arrangements, including leaving the wah track out of the mix until the first solo, then putting it in for the solo, and leaving it in thereafter. Paul was to try whatever other combinations occurred to him. Paul and I were to make a final decision after we recorded the vocal tracks, with Tony’s remote input if possible.
That’s all for now. Tomorrow or soon thereafter, I’ll post the lyrics and talk about the background of the song, in my real life, and in the context of the novel. As you will remember, in the novel, Mercy Mild and all the other songs are written by the character - Jack. I’ll ask Jack for the back story on Mercy Mild, and let you know. Au revoir.
For those interested, the arrangement, before the idea, was: 1) lead vocal by me, 2) back-up vocals by Paul, 2) acoustic rhythm guitar by me, 3) arpeggio-ish electric guitar track by Tony, 4) single note-ish lead electric guitar track by Tony, 5) bass by Paul, and 6) drums by Luke Bergen. At that point, Paul had used about 12+ tracks - not much in this day and age. The song has a very simple structure (G, Bm, C, D verse, C, G, C, D chorus), and very simple words. We felt that we had used enough different instruments. When we tried more instrumental ‘voices’, it seemed to clutter the recording. But something ‘fatter’ still seemed to be required. Tony’s single note lead guitar part is very important in this recording, and Paul had captured (and buffed up here and there) a solid performance by Tony. The solo had been played on Tony’s Stratocaster, through his Vox amplifier. The result was ‘right’, but not enough.
Paul tried routing the track through his (Paul’s) Mesa Boogie amplifier, with the controls/effects set in a bunch of different combinations. He also tried a routing through my Garnet amplifier (with and without its on-board reverb and tremolo) plus Paul’s multiple effects box - but that didn’t give enough boost to the original signal do the job. Eventually, Paul found a Mesa/effects box setting that worked best. However, when added to the other tracks and roughly edited, the result was pleasant, and appropriate for the song, but only ‘good enough’ - which isn’t good enough for Paul. So he ran the new Mesa boosted track through the Mesa again, at the same settings, and manually added wah-wah effects using my Cry Baby pedal. As a starting point he wah-wahed Tony’s part through the whole song.
On paper, the result should have been awful; cheesy and corny at best, and a God-awful mess at worst. It wasn’t. Paul played it for me, and I liked it. With a certain amount of trepidation, we played it for Tony, embedded in a rough mix of the bed tracks (including both the wah-wahed, and the un-wahed versions of the new Mesa lead guitar track) - while I sang the lead vocal live in the studio. With some hesitation, Tony said he thought it might work. All three of us agreed that Paul should try various arrangements, including leaving the wah track out of the mix until the first solo, then putting it in for the solo, and leaving it in thereafter. Paul was to try whatever other combinations occurred to him. Paul and I were to make a final decision after we recorded the vocal tracks, with Tony’s remote input if possible.
That’s all for now. Tomorrow or soon thereafter, I’ll post the lyrics and talk about the background of the song, in my real life, and in the context of the novel. As you will remember, in the novel, Mercy Mild and all the other songs are written by the character - Jack. I’ll ask Jack for the back story on Mercy Mild, and let you know. Au revoir.
Rhyme for No Reason
18/08/09
The Nygard show has come and gone and it is time for thank you’s; to Ray for backing this ‘play for pay’, to Carol Lee for thinking of me, to Tony Buchner for melodic structure, to Barb Reitman for treatin’ ‘em fine, to Krista Kline for wicked design, and to Paul for sound sublime. Again, amen!
Pat was there (for better or verse), and good friends Dianne, Glen, and Kathy (again). The rain kept the crowd to a dribble, but I won’t quibble. I didn’t read much, we just played and sang and nibbled the snacks. These were our sonic attacks:
Summer Rain
And I Love Her
Crazy Love
Except My Love For You
Set me Free
Angel of Truth
And I Love Her
Hopelessly Lost in Love
Runaway
Don’t Let me Be Misunderstood
Across the Universe
Across the Norwood Bridge
That’s right, we did the whole original list, and then some! Thanks once more to everybody (in sober prose). That’s how it goes. A la prochain.
Pat was there (for better or verse), and good friends Dianne, Glen, and Kathy (again). The rain kept the crowd to a dribble, but I won’t quibble. I didn’t read much, we just played and sang and nibbled the snacks. These were our sonic attacks:
Summer Rain
And I Love Her
Crazy Love
Except My Love For You
Set me Free
Angel of Truth
And I Love Her
Hopelessly Lost in Love
Runaway
Don’t Let me Be Misunderstood
Across the Universe
Across the Norwood Bridge
That’s right, we did the whole original list, and then some! Thanks once more to everybody (in sober prose). That’s how it goes. A la prochain.
Soon Come
16/08/09
Only one day to go until the Nygard show on Monday August 17. Only one (or two?) practices left with Tony. After ‘field-testing’ the songs from the tentative song list, we’ve trimmed down to just Summer Rain, And I Love Her, Set me Free, and It’s Only Love. If things go well and there’s time and interest, we’ve got Crazy Love, Across the Universe, and Runaway rehearsed to performance level (we hope!) and available. To our relief, Paul has agreed to set up the sound. if it doesn’t go well, we have no excuses. But we can rely on a friendly, not too critical audience, at least for the music. The words will have to stand on their own - especially if we hope to sell any books. So come out, check out the clothing for sale, check out the words and music, and stay to ask questions or to buy some fashion or a copy of the book, signed on the spot by special arrangement with me!
I’m happy to report that I’ve gotten some very encouraging (and helpful) feedback on the book from some knowledgeable people, for which I am most grateful. I’m such a music junky that I tend to forget that this site is first and foremost about a novel. So please comment about the book, the music, or anything else.
But back to my obsession - I received a lovely e-mail via this site, from a stranger who was quite taken with Hopelessly Lost in Love. She had some questions about the lyrics, which I was happy to answer, and she asked if it was alright to have some friends perform the song as a surprise for a friend of hers. At the risk of sounding overeager, I can reply to her and to everyone - please, please feel free to use any of the songs, or the lyrics, or quotes from the book, or quotes from the blog, for any purpose whatsoever (this side of the law and decency :>) ). Hell, tell me where your friend is and I’ll bring a band down and play the song myself! My new e-mail friend says she’ll maybe be at the Nygard show. I hope so. I’ve got plenty of time to talk to her or anyone who is kind enough to take an interest. See you soon.
I’m happy to report that I’ve gotten some very encouraging (and helpful) feedback on the book from some knowledgeable people, for which I am most grateful. I’m such a music junky that I tend to forget that this site is first and foremost about a novel. So please comment about the book, the music, or anything else.
But back to my obsession - I received a lovely e-mail via this site, from a stranger who was quite taken with Hopelessly Lost in Love. She had some questions about the lyrics, which I was happy to answer, and she asked if it was alright to have some friends perform the song as a surprise for a friend of hers. At the risk of sounding overeager, I can reply to her and to everyone - please, please feel free to use any of the songs, or the lyrics, or quotes from the book, or quotes from the blog, for any purpose whatsoever (this side of the law and decency :>) ). Hell, tell me where your friend is and I’ll bring a band down and play the song myself! My new e-mail friend says she’ll maybe be at the Nygard show. I hope so. I’ve got plenty of time to talk to her or anyone who is kind enough to take an interest. See you soon.
So, Anyway
10/08/09
So anyway, we are substituting It’s Only Love for Runaway. The thought is that the latter is just a bit older than the other songs, and maybe a bit too ‘electric’ to do on amplified acoustics. Regardless, we can still do it as an encore. (See definition of ‘Delusions of Grandeur’). That’s all. I’ll keep you updated. Off to Doug A.’s Wednesday night for an old fashioned jam session with Dan the Bass Man.
Hopefully Last in Limbo
05/08/09
Back at the Ellice Cafe, home of the $2.75 (all in) toast and coffee, and the free wireless internet. I hereby proclaim it the Annex to the Scottish Pavilion of Folklorama. The visit by Doug and Carol Anderson last week was a success, so we hope to be recording together - maybe in the fall. If he can fit it in, Doug will be helping me do the September 17 gig at the Millenium Library. Tony Buchner will be doing his last show with me (for the time being I hope) on August 17 at 6:30PM at Nygard Fashion Park, 1626 Kenaston Boulevard. So, Tone Bear fans, take note. The Nygard gig will be a little different - and a bit of an experiment for me, the publisher, and Nygard. Because of the setting in a retail store, with clothes buyers who may or may not have any knowledge or interest in readings and songs by an unknown author, we’re going to try playing a few cover songs. This will hopefully entertain somewhat (we’ll see!) and draw a crowd to the spot where we’ll be set up. It can’t hurt (or not much anyway) for anyone who is there specifically to hear about the novel.
Pending how rehearsals go, the first cut at a program is as follows:
1. Summer Rain (Johnny Rivers)
2. Crazy Love (Van Morrison)
3. And I Love Her (Beatles)
4. Introduction by Barb of Nygard
5. Set-up by me
6. First Reading - I’m Losing Everything (chapter one of book)
7. Except My Love For You
15? minute break
8. Set Me Free (KInks)
9. Across the Universe (Beatles)
10. Second Reading - No Thanks (after dinner in Gimli)
11. Angel of Truth
15? minute break
12. Runaway (Del Shannon)
13. Third Reading - Grad 1968 (Guess Who play Glenlawn Collegiate)
14. Hopelessly Lost on Love
15. Questions
16. Chat and book signings
The songs were chosen for familiarity, appropriateness, and my ability to sing them! On the last point, thanks to Doug for the many reps he and I spent on most of the songs. If circumstances allow, he and I could do this set without too much strain. And probably will if Bendecido sets up more retail or whatever gigs.
Finally, Hopelessly Lost in Love is tracked and mixed, but not mastered for sad reasons beyond Paul’s control. But it will be soon.
Ciao, you beautiful stranger!
Pending how rehearsals go, the first cut at a program is as follows:
1. Summer Rain (Johnny Rivers)
2. Crazy Love (Van Morrison)
3. And I Love Her (Beatles)
4. Introduction by Barb of Nygard
5. Set-up by me
6. First Reading - I’m Losing Everything (chapter one of book)
7. Except My Love For You
15? minute break
8. Set Me Free (KInks)
9. Across the Universe (Beatles)
10. Second Reading - No Thanks (after dinner in Gimli)
11. Angel of Truth
15? minute break
12. Runaway (Del Shannon)
13. Third Reading - Grad 1968 (Guess Who play Glenlawn Collegiate)
14. Hopelessly Lost on Love
15. Questions
16. Chat and book signings
The songs were chosen for familiarity, appropriateness, and my ability to sing them! On the last point, thanks to Doug for the many reps he and I spent on most of the songs. If circumstances allow, he and I could do this set without too much strain. And probably will if Bendecido sets up more retail or whatever gigs.
Finally, Hopelessly Lost in Love is tracked and mixed, but not mastered for sad reasons beyond Paul’s control. But it will be soon.
Ciao, you beautiful stranger!